A jobs miss moved the front end nothing. A draft nobody has voted on moved it seven basis points. Payrolls land at 08:30 into a curve that has just told you what it actually reads.

The Nasdaq fell 0.83% and New York barely noticed. Thirteen hours later Seoul suspended programme trading over the same number. Someone is mispricing this, and it is not both of them.

September hike pricing fell ten points on one unsigned sentence about a waterway. The S&P booked a record. Then two companies beat everything and lost eight percent each.

Crude gave up five percent because a strike was cancelled, then bought a third of it back overnight because a projectile hit a cargo ship. Equities kept the lot and added more.

Crude gave back 5.46% because an attack was called off, not because a barrel moved. Iran’s own ministry says the talks in progress do not cover whether Hormuz opens.

Amazon beat every operating line, converted none of it into cash, and still cleared consensus by three times. The difference was a $53.4bn mark on a company it cannot sell.